Friday, 10 July 2015

Why the 'I have a boyfriend' excuse is the worst

I have a boyfriend stop

So you're just walking down the street, minding your own business and trying to get where you wanna be. You see some guy running up behind you and you know for sure he's gonna try one of two things a) chat you up, or b) mug you (you're kind of hoping it's the latter). He gets you talking and even after several blunt replies and sarcastic Lucy Watson bitch stares he still doesn't get the message and asks for your number. What's your response?

I'm going to take an educated guess and say 95% of female readers here would say 'sorry I've got a boyfriend' and walk off. I however do not, and you shouldn't either. Here's why..

When someone I'm not interested in asks for my number I simply say 'no.' To this I often get a 'so you have a boyfriend then?' to which my response, once again, is 'no'. 'So why you playing, why you not wanna give me your number girl'. Usually follows.

When they ask why, and there's no legitimate sounding reason (unlike the 16 year old who asked the other day - my response being 'go home kid your dinners on') then I will reply 'because I don't want to.' 

Telling a guy you have a boyfriend when you don't may seem like the easiest solution to get a guy off your case, but in reality this is an awful excuse. When you tell a guy you have a boyfriend they leave you alone, not because they are respecting you and your choices, but out of respect for another guy, not wanting to trespass on his 'property'. This will make these boys think that the only reason you denied them is because you're taken, not because they're creepy and you don't know them. This will lead them to do it again and again to other girls. You want them to leave you alone because you want them to leave you alone, not because they feel they have to in order not to disrespect another guy. By saying no, they will learn to respect the women's own decisions. 

So to sum it up, the phrase to forget: 'I have a boyfriend, sorry'.

The phrases to pick up: 'No', 'I don't want to', 'I'm not interested', 'I don't know you'.

No one should feel pressured to lie in order to avoid unwanted attention. No one should feel as thought they rely on being the possession of another in order to gain respect from men. Saying no can feel super awkward at first, but trust me it works, and it's worth it.

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